Do you remember long quiet winter days, when there was nothing to do but sit in front of a fire with a steaming mug and a worn book? Or hours spent outside building snowmen and snow forts, only going back inside once your nose had lost all feeling, drinking hot chocolate with plenty of marshmallows to ward of the lingering cold.
Those were always the best days, tucked away like diamonds in a coal mine between homework and social obligations, and the days I remember best from my elementary school years (mainly the snow fun days), and even the days, few and far between, that I long for from just last year.
Life's been hard and messy lately. Everything from my grades to my family life seems to be crumbling apart, and I don't know how to stop it. I have been trying to see this rough patch as an opportunity to grow, but that doesn't make pushing through the days that seem to last much more than twenty four hours any easier. There are times when I find myself full of worry and dread as soon as I wake up in the morning, and by Tuesday already longing for Friday.
Most of the time I don't want to face all the hard things I am confronted with and know that I have to do. But I also know that there is always hope; as C.S. Lewis stated, "There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind". This afternoon driving in the car with my Mom, a Christmas song about a candle in the window came on. After I commented on how gorgeous the melody was, my Mom, wise as she is, went even further, talking about how she loved it because of what the candle represented; in the middle of winter, of the dead season when you feel stuck and tired, the little candle is there burning to remind you of the light that is to come.
So I will continue to push through, and know that God's plan is beautiful, I just need to trust Him. This hard time will eventually end, but until then I will savor the peaceful Friday afternoons and mugs full of chai tea, sunset photos and chiming Christmas music, and I won't give up hope.
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